The First Shower

[Rosemary-Louise]

(OCC: I don't know if there's a specific way the bathing room is set up so I used my imagination. I basically just made it a locker room without all the lockers and more than 3 showers.)

Rosemary walked down the hall with her arms folded across her chest as a chaser held onto the right one tightly. She bit down roughly on her lower lip to keep from begging and screaming. She had a feeling that if she did the wrong thing she would get sent back to her room or some place just as bad.

Show no fear, she thought to herself in determination.

This would be Rosemary's first shower since coming to the asylum. She heard the showering room wasn't the cleanest and the water was near freezing but all that didn't matter. She only wanted to be clean.

"Hurry up," the chaser growled at her and pushed her forward roughly.

As she walked toward the end of the room she looked around and saw a few other girls in their own stalls, their own chasers lingering close by.
Stepping into the shower stall, Rosemary took off her shift and hung it on the old, rusted bar that held a towel.

Her arms tightened around her torso and she put her head down and winced when the cold water hit her, wishing it would warm up. After a few minutes she finally gave up hope that the water would heat up and began to clean herself.
All the while, she couldn't shake the feeling that she was being watched.

She knew the chasers were in the room and could see her but these eyes were different. They were practically burning a hole through her skin they were staring so hard.

Rose sighed. This is a nightmare...

[Lenore Sinclair]

As she was marched to the shower room, Lenore carefully took in all the surroundings and the route taken. These could be added in on the map she and Rosemary had made and squirreled away. For now, the small girl thought it best to keep a complacent and docile attitude. Around the chasers, she kept her head low and always assumed either a sad or emotionless expression. Lenore dared not directly at them; she knew they'd see the life in her eyes and would likely become suspicious. It made things easier to let them think they'd broken her.

The chaser led her into the shower room. Allowing some slack on the leash, he gruffly said, "Be quick, little girl."

"Yes sir." Soft voice. Eyes low. Meek nod. Perfect.

Lenore mechanically removed her shift and stockings before walking into an empty stall. The cold water felt like hail as it hit her bare skin. As she shivered and bathed, the cold Lenore turned around to assess the architecture of the room, as well as all the entrances and exits. She stopped when she saw a shock of bright red hair and her heart soared. Rosemary was here too! Of course she would be, their cells were close to each other. It only made sense.

As she scrubbed, she curiously observed Rosemary's form. Her friend had a more fuller figure than she. Rose's wet hair also fell in graceful sheets compared to her own choppy locks. Realizing how rude she was being with staring, Lenore lowered her gaze and rapidly scrubbed her hair. For once, she didn't mind being cold. Even though it made her lips blue, it made her blush look like a faint rosy color.

"Like a corpse with too much rouge," she mumbled to herself.

[Rosemary-Louise]

Rose's head snapped to the left in panic but she calmed down immediately when her eyes landed on the girl who had quickly become her friend.
She looked her over briefly before smiling softly at Lenore and then turned back to her shower and cut the water off.

Rosemary was only able to get the towel that was provided for her around her body before the now familiar hand wrapped around her left arm tightly and yanked her out of the shower.
"Time's up," he hissed.

"Can I at least get dressed first?" she hissed, struggling to keep up with the fast moving chaser.

"No, you can get dressed in your room. I already allowed you extra time to gawk at your girly friend over there," he said, pointing to Lenore as they walked past her.

Rose flushed and hoped what he said wasn't overheard. "I wasn't gawking! And surely you could spare me another minute to put on my shift!"

The chaser didn't listen, instead he walked faster until she was back in her room. He disregarded her like trash, threw a clean shift at her, and walked out, leaving her room door open.
"You could be gentle next time, you know!" she yelled at him

Rosemary-Louise picked up the shift from the floor and sat on her bed, leaving the towel firmly wrapped around her before throwing her right leg over her left and began combing her fingers through her hair.

She briefly wondered if she'd be able to see Lenore before they called lights out and then allowed herself to get lost in her thoughts, completely unaware of her surroundings...

[Lenore Sinclair]

Catching the smile Rosemary threw her way, Lenore returned it with one of her own. After finishing her hair, she grabbed a towel and dried herself off. It may be spring, but it was still chilly. She hated the feeling of water still evaporating off her skin while in a cold room. Lenore quickly stepped into a clean shift, pulled it up, and grabbed her stockings. Annoyed with her quickness, her chaser yanked her leash harder than necessary. The girl dearly hoped he was satisfied with the choking cough and vowed to do bodily harm to him next time she left her cell.

As she was dragged to her cell, what Rosemary's chaser said finally hit her. An annoyed growl came from her throat as her cheeks turned pink. This kept happening lately and she wasn't entirely sure why. Was she doing something different?

The chaser shoved the cold girl into her cell and left. Once he was out of earshot, Lenore swore loudly.

"That idiotic louse! I will make him pay," the girl shouted, suddenly feeling quite hot-blooded. She took deep breaths and picked herself up off the floor. Sighing, she focused on calming herself down. There was no point in allowing herself to get worked up when there were no chasers to attack. She noticed the door was ajar and headed over to Rosemary's cell. She poked her head in and smiled awkwardly.

"Sorry you had to hear my outburst like that..."

[Rosemary-Louise]

Maybe I've finally done it, she thought sourly to herself. Maybe I've finally earned my place in this hell!

As Rosemary lost herself in her thoughts she tried to think of anything and everything but the young, dark-haired girl she befriended but her mind would always stray back to her. Rose was usually one with her emotions but now she couldn't even decipher them and that made her upset, both at herself and the girl.

How dare she! she cried in her head. How dare she make me feel... this way.

Her head snapped suddenly to the right and she was surprised to see Lenore standing there -- awkward and apologetic. Her cheeks stained bright red and her arms clutched tightly at her towel to ensure it wouldn't fall, though it was already tight enough, in a moment of very, very rare self-consciousness. She'd never doubted her beauty or spotted a flaw until now--if she were to look in a mirror she'd probably be able to find many things wrong with herself.

"I'm sorry, did you say something?"

[Lenore Sinclair]

"Oh... um, I wanted to apologize for my outburst a few seconds ago, but I'm guessing you didn't hear it..."

She was grateful Rosemary didn't seem to hear it. It was embarrassing to have outbursts like that. They just sort of happened and she got really passionate about it. Lenore blinked and noticed her friend's reddened complexion and somewhat defensive posture. Alarm bells went off in her head and she walked over to Rosemary.

"Is something wrong, Rose," she inquired with a worried expression.

[Rosemary-Louise]

"I'm fine," she snapped hotly. "I'd be better if you left me alone."

Rose watched with wide eyes as her friend recoiled from her. She slid her shift over herself and removed her towel before carelessly tossing it onto the ground. "Wait, I'm sorry. I'm fine, Lenore, thank you," she said quietly.

"I was, am, upset but I'd rather not talk about that." Rosemary grinned suddenly. "How was your shower? Mines was just awful! My chaser didn't even think to give me a new pair of panties! Arg, that stupid bastard. Anyways, I hope yours went better than mine."

[Lenore Sinclair]

Lenore flinched when her friend snapped at her. She felt like it was her fault somehow even though she wasn't sure what she'd done. This seemed to be a trend here and the girl wasn't sure what to do to fix it.

And... now Rose was apologizing and okay? Not that she minded, of course she was glad that her friend was okay, but she still had a sinking feeling she'd done something wrong. Lenore decided not to pursue the subject. Rose had changed it for a reason, after all.

"Um... mine was very cold. And I don't think they give us knickers. They must think it's too much to pay for to waste on 'crazy' girls."

Despite the relative stability in the conversation and atmosphere, Lenore still had a slight frown on. Her curiosity as to what was upsetting her friend was getting to her. This curiosity usually got her in trouble, but she gave in every time. However, maybe she could word it in such a way that it didn't come off as prodding. Maybe if she said it this way...

"If you change your mind and decide you want to talk about what's upsetting you, I'm here to listen..."

Perfect! There's no way that could upset her! Lenore mentally congratulated herself on her ingenuity.

[Rosemary-Louise]

Rosemary moved further to left, away from Lenore, suddenly uncomfortable with their too close proximity. This always happened when she was upset. She'd start to shut people out before breaking down completely. She had times where she'd go weeks refusing to talk to anyone because she was upset with them all and now she was upset with Lenore and couldn't even decide if she had the right to be! And she was upset with herself!

"I would be able to understand their reasoning if we were actually crazy," she responded. "I don't think we are. We're just... different."

Rose was avoiding what the girl had said and she knew it. She wasn't going to say anything at all, for fear that she would say the wrong thing or too much, but the girl's curious, innocent eyes got to her and she snapped.

"Dammit, it is your fault and you know it!" she yelled jumping up from the bed and throwing her arms in the air on reflex. Just as quick as she was to yell she was to apologize as her hands covered her mouth and her eyes widened. "No, no, I didn't mean to say that. I'm sorry. I should have... I shouldn't have... Thank you, Lenore, I appreciate that very, very much. It is such a kind thing of you to offer."

[Lenore Sinclair]

Okay... maybe this wasn't a genius idea after all, Lenore noted. She could tell Rose hadn't even wanted the subject brought up. Curse her sense of curiosity! All it did was make people uncomfortable and cause trouble! That was a stupid idea. The dark-haired girl watched her friend as she answered. Shifting her gaze to the floor, Lenore decided to give up on the subject.

The girl jumped when Rose yelled at her. 'I knew it,' thought Lenore, 'I knew it was my fault.' She had to have done something wrong. At the moment that didn't even matter. Lenore had indeed heard Rose's apology, but she knew enough to know when someone was just being nice. The young girl simply nodded.

"I think I should leave you alone... um... whatever it is I did, I'm really sorry. I won't bother you," she quietly spoke before heading back to her cell.

[Rosemary-Louise]

Hot tears pooled into Rose's eyes when Lenore walked out of her cell, shutting the door softly behind her. She fell face first onto her cot and, squeezing her eyes shut tightly, groaned in frustration.

She truly didn't mean to yell at the girl and hurt her feelings! She was just confused and she absolutely hated being confused. Rosemary didn't like having no control of her life and her emotions, so being locked away in an asylum and having unidentifiable feelings for this girl had her on edge and she was bound to snap.

Surely she won't stop being my friend because of this! Rose thought to herself in a panic.

Sighing she turned on her side and faced the wall and decided to go after Lenore after her nap, when she would be calmer and more reasonable--nicer.

---

When her eyes opened again it was pitch black save for the slither of moonlight that shone into her room from her window that was too high up for her to see out of.

She sat up and rubbed her eyes before looking around the cell, surprised to see that her door was slightly ajar. She got up and tip-toed to the door and opened it just enough to stick her head out only to pull it back in quickly.

Lanterns burning with bright fire were hanging on the walls in the hall and she was able to see a chaser checking on the girls--he had been at Lenore's door. She rinsed her mouth out with the water from the sink that was in her cell and waited a good five minutes before peeking her head out the room again.

She looked to her left and then to her right before tip-toeing out of her cell and into the hallway. She made her way to her friend's cell and grabbed one of the lanterns off the wall before opening door, closing it back softly behind her.

"Lenore, sweet girl, are you awake?"

It was a stupid thing to ask Rosemary thought, seeing as how the lantern allowed her to see the girl's face and showed that her eyes were closed.

[Lenore Sinclair]

Flopping down on her bed in defeat, Lenore stared wearily at the ceiling. She felt the familiar sensation of wanting to cry but it was mixed with something else. Her chest hurt. She hoped it wasn't anything serious. The girl couldn't recall banging into anything. It still didn't change the fact that she wanted to cry. Her stubborn pride refused to give in. Besides, there was no sense in crying when she didn't have a handkerchief to mop the unwanted moisture up. Rolling onto her side, she closed her eyes and fell into an uneasy sleep.

--

Lenore descended into the depths of a nightmare she commonly experienced. It went on like it always did, although there seemed to be a new sense of underlying urgency. She wasn't sure exactly where the fear came from this time. Perhaps it had to do with fear of losing Rose? That was part of it, but not all of it. There were also these new feelings that had surfaced since meeting her. The dark-haired girl didn't know what to make of them. The feelings made her so elatedly happy and yet she also became so sad and melancholic.

This was new. Rose was in her nightmare as well. Perhaps she could shed some insight on how to get out of it, if only Lenore could hear her. Just as she embraced her friend, a rush of understanding came. It lasted for less than a second and darkness surrounded her once more.

Light. Now there was light trying to pry through her closed lids. Lenore groaned and opened her eyes, blinking blearily. As her eyes adjusted to this new light source, she saw who was carrying it and relaxed. Rose being here meant everything was okay. She sat up and smiled groggily.

"Rose, you're here. I'm so glad you're safe."

[Rosemary-Louise]

"Well, of course I am safe," Rosemary said, rolling her eyes playfully. She set the lantern down on a nearby chair before sinking down to the floor, bringing her knees up to her chest and rested her chin on them, her arms wrapping around her legs.

"And of course I'm here!" she said. "I wasn't going to leave you be with you thinking I was upset at you."

"I'm not, you know, upset with you, I mean. I get that way sometimes. I was frustrated but I am okay now." Rose closed her eyes and sighed, allowing a small smile to grace her lips. She immediately felt better entering the room and her mood only improved when Lenore smiled at her, seemingly excited to see her.
"I hope your smile means I am forgiven," she said without opening her eyes. "Forgiven for those awful words I said to you back in my cell."

[Lenore Sinclair]

There was no tension in the air whatsoever. Lenore was most grateful for this. Rose wasn't upset anymore and she knew her friend wasn't saying it just to humor her. She smiled, touched that Rosemary came in to reconcile with her.

"Yes, of course you're forgiven, Rose. I could never hold a grudge against you," she responded. Lenore stood and walked over to friend. She knelt down and hugged her around her shoulders. The young girl was glad to have Rose as a friend. Despite how confusing things could get, everything also felt much more... complete.

[Rosemary-Louise]

Rose's heart felt immensely lighter when Lenore hugged her. She was happy to see that she hadn't ruined the first good thing to happen to her for the first time in a long time. She grinned and wrapped her arms around her hips and rested her head on her chest. Rosemary ran her fingers through the girl's hair, a new gester that calmed her down and allowed her to get out the feelings she couldn't identify and put into words.

"Well, then, I'm glad we were able to get that situation under control and out of the way. I couldn't imagine losing my very first best friend," Rose said. "Especially if it meant being alone in this hell hole!"

"So..." Rosemary said after a few minutes of silence. "How old are you? I realize I've never asked you that before. What was your family like? How long have you been here for?"